Category: general

How Do You Decide? Home with Sister

We have two very responsible kids, if I say so myself! Our dear daughter is graduating from 6th grade this year. Our dear son (with the food allergies) is an assertive nine year old. Daughter has become more independent this year especially, encouraged by our son’s “endless” sports activities. Now that she has a cell phone, she is going on 18!

So… the question has come up whether daughter can watch dear son so I don’t have to “drag them along” on boring errands. This is a hard one to answer. I think they are very responsible for their ages. They can cook with the toaster oven and the microwave. Daughter can cook on the stove top and the oven if a grownup is around. She can do wash.

But… our rule is that whoever is in charge of dear son must be willing and able to give the Epipen. Dear son outweighs his older sister by at least 10 lbs. Though he is brave in the batter’s box in baseball, he HATES having his blood taken for tests. He’s never had the Epipen, so I’m not sure if that would go better.

For now then, they are coming along. I think it is most likely that dear son will be ready to give himself the Epipen before he is willing to have it given by his big sister.

Our Family’s Vacation Tips

A condensed version of this article appeared in the June/July 2010 edition of the Food Allergy News, published by The Food Allergy & Anaphylaxis Network.

We are a family of four:  dad, mom, older daughter and younger son.  Our son Robbie was diagnosed as peanut allergic as a toddler.  Since then he has reacted to chick peas, lentils and peas.  We also avoid tree nuts and lima beans.  Fortunately, Robbie has never been allergic to eggs or dairy.

We have enjoyed fun trips to Disney World, Boston, Chicago, and various beach areas.  We are fortunate that our son has not had a food reaction on any of these trips, thanks to good planning, helpful people and some luck.  Here are our planning tips.

1.  Is this a risky location? Hmm, so it’s an isolated beach thirty minutes from anywhere.  Or a bay side resort accessible only by boat.  For my own peace of mind, we don’t go there.  I like a modern hospital and EMS service nearby.  A remote location could work for a more adventurous mom, but it is just not for me.

2.  Things always happen on vacation! In our family, someone is always getting pink eye, or a fever bug, or a finger stuck in a door.  Next time, it could be an allergy emergency.  So we bring our allergy stuff!

  • two or more Epipens, that have not expired
  • a doctor’s letter explaining why Robbie needs the Epipens
  • antihistamine medicine such as Benadryl
  • inhalers if needed
  • wipes
  • lots of safe snacks
  • chef cards listing the foods Robbie must avoid

3.  I know you don’t want to cook on vacation, but… When we are traveling to beach areas, we try to rent a condo instead of staying in a hotel.  Having a small kitchen lets us save money, feed the kids more quickly and better manage ingredients.  We once found a spoon with caked-on peanut butter in the silverware drawer, so we definitely take a look around the condo’s kitchen before we start cooking!

4.  Don’t be like us.  Nothing is worse than wandering around a strange vacation area looking for a safe restaurant.  Unless it is wandering around a strange vacation area with a hot tired hungry cranky family that includes a grandma with bad knees and the family dog.  Don’t let this be you!

  • Get some restaurant ideas from your laptop, a local map or hotel employee.
  • Check the menus for two or three places.
  • Call ahead to ask if they can make a safe meal for your allergic child.
  • If you are tech savvy, pull out your iPhone and search while you walk!  (More on food allergy apps coming in a future post.)

5.  Are we there yet?  We’d been driving on a turnpike for hours.  We finally pulled off to a rest stop, waited in line for restrooms and then waited in line for food.  When we got to the front of the line, the manager couldn’t find the ingredients sheet.  Robbie ended up eating snack bags from the tourist shop.

Each state has different vendors for their turnpike fast food restaurants.  Check before you start loading up the car to see which can provide a safe meal for your child.  Many now have allergen information online, or provide an email address to find out more.

6.  Go with the tried and true. It is OK to go with an old standby.  Robbie has eaten at McDonalds and Burger King in the midst of wonderful food courts full of diverse ethnic treats.  His sister ate there too, by her choice.  I’m not proud of this, but it worked for us.  My husband and I enjoyed trying different foods while the kids were having Skittles for dessert.  We all ate something we liked.  Experimenting with new foods is not part of Robbie’s vacation experience.

7.  Trust your instincts. Just because a restaurant server is nodding their head doesn’t mean they understand you, your chef card or food allergies in general.  If you talk to a server and then a manager and still don’t feel understood, this restaurant may not be the place for dinner.  The server may just be in the US for the summer.  Or the manager may not believe food allergies are real.  On vacation, I don’t feel like it is worth my time to educate a new restaurant.  Keep walking!

8.  Don’t visit the place that serves peanut soup. Yes, here in Virginia there are restaurants with peanut soup as a specialty.  No, we don’t ever eat there.  Peanut soup, peanut sauce or peanut butter and jelly sandwiches on a menu raise a red flag.  I don’t want the food service worker to jump from making a pb&j sandwich to Robbie’s ham and cheese.  Unless this restaurant has a wonderful reputation with the local food allergy support group, then stay far away!

9.  Let your child do the talking. Vacation is a fun time and it can also be a learning time.  Some day your child will prefer eating out with their friends instead of the family. Start getting them ready now!  Let your child begin the allergy conversation with the server.  A shy child may find it easier to hand the server or manager the chef card that explains his allergies.  You are right beside your child to support them and clarify any issues.

We hope you have a super vacation time this summer with your family!

Christina Black has been a member of FAAN since 2003.  She has written two allergy books for children:  “Mommy, Is This Safe to Eat?” and “Starting School with a Food Allergy.”

Restaurant with Peanut Dipping Sauce

Should you leave? Before you answer, here’s the day so far.

– Independence Hall
– Congress Hall
– Betsy Ross House
– Search for a public bathroom
– Penn’s Landing
– Group of 10 people – 6 of them hungry kids
– Also dining is a wheat allergic vegetarian

We did look at the brief menu outside the restaurant. It looked a little new-age for our family but OK. We are just happy that they could seat all 10 of us.

Then we open the full menu.

  • Thai Chicken Lettuce Wraps: bibb lettuce and spicy peanut dipping sauce
  • Grilled Thai Chicken Skewers:  jasmine rice and peanut dipping sauce.
  • Jumbo Lump Crab Pad Thai: rice noodles, tofu, egg, scallions and peanuts

At this point I am really sorry I didn’t follow my own advice about being prepared, checking out safe restaurants ahead, having some backup food with us!  If we had been home, less tired, less hungry or had not been with extended family I think we would have left at this point.

But they also had hamburgers on the menu.  We talked in depth with our experienced server and also with a manager.  They were confident they could serve our son a safe meal.  We double checked with a manager when his food was brought out.  Dear son ate the whole thing and was fine.  Kudos to the Continental Restaurant and Martini Bar in Philadelphia!

Notes to me for next time:  BE PREPARED!  You will be tired, hungry, cranky and need to stop for a meal before you expect to.

 

Letter to New Team

In “Play Ball” I mentioned the challenge of a new baseball team, with new parents, coaches and teammates.  So far things are going really well.  The head coach is very supportive.  I trained the coaches on the Epipen and it turns out an assistant coach is also allergic to peanuts.

Dear son was offered chocolate in the dugout during Tuesday’s game, but he stuck to the script and didn’t have any.  I told him how proud we are of him, and how he really is ready for more independence since he can handle situations like that.  (He also walked twice that game, and scored both times!  I was there for the second run and yelled my head off when he crossed home plate. )

As promised, here is the note to coaches, parents and players that we sent at the beginning of the season, with the coach’s OK.

WARNING!  I am severely allergic to PEANUTS and tree nuts.  I am also allergic to chick peas, lentils, peas, lima beans and some soy.

My Responsibility:  In order for me to avoid a life-threatening reaction, I avoid eating foods that contain these ingredients.  If I accidentally eat one of these foods, I must get an Epipen shot and go to the ER.  I will always bring my own snacks to practices and games.

Teammates: Please don’t bring peanut products into the dugout.  If your family packed you peanut butter or granola bars, please eat them away from the team.  Please wipe off your hands with a handi-wipe before throwing me the baseball!

Coaches and Parents: I am very careful about what I eat.  Baseball bagBut if I have a reaction at practice, I would need an adult’s help.  Warning signs include an itchy tongue or itchy throat and hives.   Symptoms of a severe reaction include throat tightening, tongue swelling, and difficulty breathing.  If I have a reaction, please give me an immediate Epipen shot and call 911.  My Epipen is always in a green bag in my baseball bag.

Birthday _______
Mom cell _______
Home ________
Dad work ________

The parents and kids have also been really good about son’s food allergies.  Thank you AAA Nats!